Thursday, October 20, 2016

This Time of Year

The world was weighted on my chest
My heart felt heavy
This time of year was always hard
When your face was on every person that walked by
I flinched a little more this time of year
I cried a little more this time of year
I felt the weight of ten thousand bricks 
And they all landed on me
I carried around more emotional baggage this time of year
People stopped and stared more this time of year
The changing leaves reminded me of dead trees
And the fall breeze that was blowing through my hair
I wore different clothes this time of year
To hide what was really inside
I was paranoid more this time of year
My eyes in the back of my head
Watching who was following me
I was scared more this time of year
Every hand on my shoulder was yours
And the wind on my neck 
It was your breath running down my spine
My heart rate increased this time of year
Palpitations pulsing through everything 
I held my heart a little closer this time of year
Because it was beaten and bruised and rough around the edges
When I saw your face on every person that walked by
I never left the house this time of year
And even there
My clothes felt of you
My room smelled of you
And my home was no longer safe because of you
This time of year haunted like the death
Ticking away the seconds until the break down
Would she survive this time of year again
Or would the beast consumer her
Like it did for the past three years
 

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